Breathe No More
by GundamWingFanatic90
Summary: Oneshot. Two years of hard living have taken their toll on Kurosaki Ichigo. When things finally come to a head, is there anything to keep him from prematurely becoming a permanent denizen of the other world? Rated T for language and angst. IchiRuki. Done.


**_Disclamer: I do not own BLEACH or any of the affiliated characters or places. Only the plot of this story is mine._**

**_Warnings: One instance of a dropped F-bomb, and lots and lots of angst. Possible OOC-ness, sorry. I did a little research, and it _is_ possible for exhaustion to cause fevers._**

* * *

**_Breathe No More.  
__By GundamWingFanatic90.  
Category: BLEACH.  
Rating: G to PG-13.  
Reasons: Language and Angst._**

* * *

They had been together for a year when he proposed to her, at age 18. They had been engaged for six months when they were married in a small spring wedding, with all of their shinigami friends and their human friends and family in attendance as they took their vows. They had been married for two months when she gave him the news that she was pregnant. They had known each other a total of four years to the day when their baby was born. They had known their new son for a grand total of three weeks when she was called back to the Soul Society for the war against the Arrancar and Aizen. They had received the summons a mere five hours before they had the huge argument that led to her leaving and him being saddled, at 20, with a three-week-old son, the task of defending his home turf from the hollows that were still cropping up at random intervals, getting through college, attempting to control his still-dangerous inner hollow, and trying to hold his part-time job in his father's clinic all at once. That had been two years ago.

Now, at age 22, Kurosaki Ichigo was a hardened student whose best friends were his comrades and a good cup of coffee. His family consisted of his two-year-old son, his sisters, his father, and all of his friends from high school, aside from a few of the shinigami that he had managed to keep in touch with over the years.

"Daisuke, you need to widen your stance slightly," Ichigo was currently saying to his young son. The youngest Kurosaki looked up at his father before glancing back down to his feet and spreading them another inch or so apart. Ichigo judged the distance and nodded with a smile, ruffling Daisuke's orange hair slightly before adjusting the positions of the toddler's hands. Then he began to go through the basics of punching and kicking with Daisuke again, just as Yuzu and Karin walked into the room, shortly followed by their father. Yuzu shook her head in amusement and exasperation.

"Ichi-nii-san, _must_ he learn how to fight at such an early age?" she asked. Ichigo nodded firmly.

"Hai," he answered. "He's gotta be strong when he enters school so that the bullies don't pick on him. I'm gonna make sure that he never has to put up with crap from other kids about anything." Ichigo glanced tiredly up at his family. "I just don't know how much good it'll do against..." He trailed off, his eyes taking on a faraway look for a second before he snapped out of it and finished his sentence. "...Against wounds of the heart." Yuzu and Karin exchanged concerned glances, but Isshin studied his firstborn's face for a few moments, noting the dark circles under Ichigo's eyes and the pallor of his skin, as well as the light sheen of sweat that the carrot-top had broken into.

"Karin, Yuzu," said Isshin after a little while. The girls looked to their father in question. "Could you supervise Daisuke's training for a moment? I need to speak with Ichigo about something." Ichigo blinked up at his father, but after Karin grunted and Yuzu nodded, he stood up, fluffing his son's orange tufts once more before following Isshin out of the room and into the kitchen. As Ichigo closed the door behind him, Isshin sighed and set down his clipboard, massaging his temples before turning around and looking Ichigo studiously in the face.

"You're not sleeping again, are you?" It was more a statement of fact. "And Yuzu tells me that you are not eating properly, either."

"You're correct on both accounts," countered Ichigo. "I haven't been very hungry lately, and it's been too hot in my room to sleep properly, not to mention that whenever Daisuke, God love him, has a nightmare he climbs into my bed to sleep. Needless to say, he's a rather restless sleeper. I've still got the bruises on my ribs to prove it, too." Isshin shook his head.

"That may be so, Ichigo, but you're still making us all worry for your health," he said tiredly. "I can see you going on a downward spiral; we all can, even your friends. You don't eat, you don't sleep. You only drink because you know that you wouldn't last very long otherwise and because water is easy to come by. Not only that, but you run the evening shift down here, you go to med school during the day hours, and you have an energetic two-year-old son to keep up with. That's a grueling workload, and when even a doctor admits that, then you _know_ that there's something not right." Ichigo sighed, running a hand over his face. Ah, but he had changed so much and so drastically in the past two years!

"Dad, there's not much I can do about it," he said wearily. "You know as well as I do that Daisuke is a handful, but I wouldn't trade him for this world or the next, and you also know that I'm studying medicine so that I can help save lives like I want to. I run the evening shift down here so that those that need help _now_ can get it _now_, and not have to wait until it may be too late." Now Isshin was beginning to get annoyed, though he did not show it.

"You've got a good point there, but even I know when enough is enough," he deadpanned. "Ichigo, at least take this evening and tomorrow off from work. And don't bother going to school tomorrow. I'm calling in the doctor's orders." His eyes caught Ichigo's protest before it left his lips. "And no 'but's! Yuzu, Karin, and I will take Daisuke out to see your mother and play at the park tomorrow, and I'll run up to the college and get your homework later. You are going to spend the day resting." Finally Ichigo relented and nodded, sitting down at the table as his father started making green tea. Isshin cast his son a worried glance as he set the kettle on the stove, seeing Ichigo prop his head up on his hands.

"You're exhausted, Ichigo," said Isshin. "You've got to start resting more often, even if it means that we take care of the clinic and Daisuke one or two days a week. You're going to run yourself into the ground!" Ichigo gave a bitter little chuckle.

"I've already done it," was all he said. Then Yuzu came in carrying Daisuke and smiling gently.

"Someone's ready for his bath and a nightcap," she said. Daisuke was rubbing his deep, violet eyes and yawning, but the sight of him instantly forced a grin out of Ichigo, who lifted himself to his feet and took his young son from his youngest sister and headed upstairs. Isshin and Yuzu watched Ichigo's retreating back for a moment, and then Yuzu spoke, her eyes still following her brother and nephew.

"I'm worried about him, dad," she said quietly. "He's getting worse every day!"

"I know, Yuzu," replied Isshin solemnly. "I know."

* * *

Ichigo did not sleep again that night, but it was not for the reasons that he had given his father. Sure, Daisuke did tend to kick in his sleep, and did so after he climbed into bed with Ichigo after having a nightmare. And maybe the temperature in his room was a little warm, but that was due to it being the summertime; Ichigo's body was, in fact, a few degrees cooler than a normal human's, and had been ever since he first became a shinigami, but that was beside the point. The true reason why Ichigo was not sleeping was because his body was being inhabited by Kon, the mod soul that he commissioned to watch over his son at night whilst he went out and hunted hollows. That was what Ichigo was doing now.

He hissed slightly as the fish-faced hollow managed to land a scrape on his chest, but then he countered with Zangetsu, slicing easily through the hollow's mask and into its head. Within seconds the evil spirit had vanished, having been cleansed and sent to the Soul Society. Ichigo leaned on his sword, panting slightly. After a moment, he straightened up, and stared blankly at the place where the hollow had been, gingerly fingering his wound. It was shallow, but stretched all the way from his hip to his shoulder, and skimmed over the small hole that rested where his heart should have been.

_Rukia_... he thought vaguely. Then, when the sound of beeping rang through his ears, he snapped out of his trance and pulled out the cell phone that had been given to him by Urahara Kisuke.

_Great,_ he thought. _Another hollow. Is Karakura a popular place tonight, or what?_ Without another brainwave, Ichigo used the shun-po, and soon was fighting another hollow.

* * *

When the sun came up over Karakura, Ichigo always returned to his body without fail. This time he did so with a splitting headache and a freshly-healed scar upon his half-hollowed chest from where a pair of hollows had gotten lucky in their blows. Once he was housed again in his body, Ichigo plucked Kon's pill off of his chest where he had been coughed out, and popped the soul into the stuffed lion that was clutched in Daisuke's tiny hands. Kon had enough sense to keep quiet when he became aware of his surroundings, but glared up at Ichigo's haggard face, which was rough with a couple days' worth of stubble.

"That kid kicks like a mule!" hissed the mod soul. "You're lucky that I'm trapped right now, or I'd have your ass on a platter!" Ichigo glared, but did not reply, instead getting out of bed without disturbing Daisuke and moving into the bathroom for his quick morning ritual. When he was out of sight, Kon sighed, his expression turning faintly solemn.

_Ichigo..._ he thought. But Ichigo did not hear him, or the friendly concern that plagued the mod's inner voice. Ichigo was busy brushing his teeth and shaving the stubble from his chin. When that was finished, he hopped in the shower, turning the water on warm and allowing it to wash away some of the aches that had set into his old scars. However, the heat did nothing for his headache, or for the fact that he was beginning to feel lightheaded. He pushed the dizziness away stubbornly, and clambered out of the shower before dressing and heading back to his room.

When he arrived back at his place of slumber, he immediately spotted Karin dressing Daisuke for a day at the park. A small, empty smile quirked Ichigo's lips, the warmth touching his heart for an instant before vanishing to be replaced by his customary scowl.

"Hey, Karin," he greeted. "Morning." He stopped by the pair to ruffle Daisuke's hair. "Mornin', squirt."

"Hey, Ichigo," returned Karin. Her dark eyes studied him for a moment. "You didn't sleep again." He snorted in reply.

"That's why I'm taking the day off and you and Yuzu and Dad are taking Daisuke to visit mom and to play at the park today," he countered. She frowned, but he cut her off with a grin. "I'm resting today, so don't worry. A little food and sleep and I'll be right as rain." He paused and his eyebrow twitched. "Damn, I have _got_ to stop hanging out with Orihime when I'm half-asleep... Her phrases are starting to get embedded in my brain...!" He yelled in a dramatic manner, clutching his head.

"Aaah! Ichigo is going craaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazzzzzzzzzzzzzyyyyy!!" Ichigo exclaimed in mock-insanity. "Ichigo is going to make his son, Daisuke, go crazy too!! BLARGH!!" And he lunged at Daisuke, who laughed and tried to get out of the way. However, Ichigo was too fast, and in seconds his hands were at work, running over Daisuke's sides and the backs of his knees as father tickled son ruthlessly.

"DADDY!! DADDY, THTOP!!" laughed the two-year-old, his lisp impairing his speech slightly. Ichigo gave a maniacal laugh, and lifted Daisuke's shirt up halfway.

"NEVER!!" he shouted, and bent down to blow a loud, wet raspberry on his son's pudgy belly. Daisuke shrieked with mirth, but then shouted,

"PEE-PEE!!" Taking the hint, Ichigo backed off, still chuckling faintly, only to see Karin watching them with a soft look on her face.

"What?" he asked with a raised eyebrow. Karin shook her head at her brother, still smiling.

"Nothing," she replied. "Just glad to see some of the old Ichigo back." He returned her smile, and then gazed down at his still-giggling son.

"I think I just need some time to return fully," he replied cryptically. Karin nodded sagely, and then picked up her nephew. Ichigo tuned them out a bit as he rose and dug in his chest of drawers for some comfortable clothes. Within moments, he heard Karin and Daisuke announce that they were leaving.

"Have fun," he said with forced cheerfulness. They smiled at him and then he was left alone. Rubbing his temples, he quickly changed his clothes before going downstairs. He managed to get down there just as his father was beginning to lock up the clinic. Isshin noticed his son right away.

"Oh, Ichigo," he said. "Ohayo gozaimasu." Ichigo nodded.

"Ohayo," he replied dully. Isshin's brow creased faintly in concern, but it passed in a heartbeat and he grinned.

"You know the drill for keeping the house locked down," he stated. "If you have any trouble, call 9-1-1 and then call me. We'll probably be home about three or so." Ichigo grunted. "Oh, and Yuzu wanted me to tell you that she's got some toast and fried eggs for you on the stove, and there's green tea in the teapot. See ya."

"Ja," replied Ichigo tonelessly. Isshin cast his son one last look before leaving, and then Ichigo was alone. He stood at the bottom of the stairs in silence for a moment, trying to quell both the dizziness that was creeping up on him and the pounding in his head, and then he cast the kitchen a distasteful glance.

"Not too hungry," he murmured, but walked into the kitchen anyway, glancing at the clock as he went. It was about nine o'clock in the morning. Ichigo shook his head, causing it to spin again, but he pushed away the dizziness and poured himself a cup of tea and sat down at the table with the teapot in hand.

Ichigo wasn't sure how long he sat there, gazing into space with an empty mind as he sipped his cooling tea, but after three cups of it, he found that he had had enough of it, and got up to put it away. However, when he got up, his world went yellow for a moment, and when he could see again, he found that, no matter how hard he tried to push it away, the world would not stop swirling. A bad feeling came over him.

_9-1-1..._ he thought unsteadily. _9-1-1... Gotta call..._ Ichigo tried to take a step towards the phone through the fog of unfinished thoughts in his mind, but he stumbled, and before he knew it, the world was yellow again.

_Maybe I should have... eaten something, after all..._ was his last thought before everything faded to black.

On the wall, the clock chimed 10 o'clock in the morning.

* * *

It was four o'clock in the afternoon when Isshin, Yuzu, Karin, and Daisuke returned from their venture. The visit to Masaki had taken longer than expected, and then they had picnicked at the park before playing with Daisuke for a while. They had lost track of time, and so it was later than they had predicted when they made their way home. The four of them were laughing as they came in the front door, windblown and messy, but Isshin quieted them down as an eerie silence met his ears. The complete and utter lack of sound set his nerves on edge, and his brow creased as the connotations hit his mind. Gearing up for a fight, he called his son's name into the still house. There was no response.

"Ichigo?" he called a second time. Again, no voice answered him. Turning to the girls and his grandson, Isshin gave out orders.

"Yuzu, check up in his room, and if he's not there, check the rest of the upper level," he began. "Karin, check the clinic, and take Daisuke with you. I'll check the kitchen." As the girls and Daisuke moved off to do as ordered, Isshin turned to his right and entered the kitchen. Immediately his eyes found the teapot on the western-style table and the shattered cup and spilled tea next to it. Worry gnawing at his insides, he rounded the table. His blood froze in his veins.

Ichigo lay on his side on the floor next to the counter. His eyes were closed, his quiet breathing shallow and uneven, and a sheen of sweat coated his tense face and neck, gleaming faintly in the glow of the electric lights.

"YUZU!! KARIN!!" Isshin shouted as he swooped down to his son's side. The sound of slamming doors and pounding footsteps met his ears, but he paid them no mind, feeling for Ichigo's pulse and finding it erratic. The 22-year-old's skin was very hot to the touch, and as Yuzu entered the room Isshin ordered her to go get the thermometer from the clinic. He told Karin to bring in some towels and cool water, and then he told Daisuke to go sit at the table and be quiet so that he could work. Yuzu returned with the professional-grade thermometer, and Isshin, turning Ichigo onto his back, took the younger man's temperature. The father's eyes widened considerably when the reading came up.

"Yuzu, call an ambulance! He's got a fever of 40.6 degrees Celsius (105 degrees Farenheit)!" Yuzu rushed to do his bidding, and soon returned, saying that the ambulance was on its way. Karin came in with the water and towels, and they gently began to sponge Ichigo down. Daisuke looked on, violet eyes wide and full of tears in his fear for his father, but otherwise he was mostly quiet.

Only when the sirens of the ambulance sounded outside their home did Daisuke move or speak.

"Daddy, pleathe don't die..."

* * *

Kuchiki Rukia hummed a little as she walked down the streets of Karakura with Abarai Renji at her side. She was happy to be going home at last, even if it was only for a few days or so whilst she rested from the war with the Arrancar. After that, and if she was lucky, she and Ichigo were going to be heading back to the otherworld to hopefully end the war for good. Renji chuckled at his friend's enthusiasm.

"Happy to be going home, then, are we?" he teased. Rukia simply beamed at him.

"I can't wait to see everyone again!" she exclaimed. "And Daisuke... I wonder if he remembers his mommy?" Renji blinked, and then thought for a second, scratching his cheek.

"He'll be two, now, right?" Rukia nodded happily.

"Yeah," she said, and then her face fell slightly. "Two years of his life I've missed..." She shook herself vigorously, trying to cheer up. "But I've got so many years to make it up to him, I can't help but be happy!" Renji nodded in acceptance, and then paused.

"But what about Ichigo?" he asked. "Didn't you two have a big fight right before you left?" Now it was Rukia's turn to hesitate, having never told anyone about the subject of that particular argument. Finally she decided that it was time to tell her friend about it.

"Yes, we did have a big argument," she admitted. "He didn't want me to go fight in the war. He said that he should be the one to go, that he would be better suited to war, that I should stay and raise Daisuke. Ichigo said that no child should be raised without their mother, but I didn't listen." She paused again, brow furrowing in regret as she recalled the angry words that had passed between her and her husband. "I told him that he should be the one to remain with Daisuke, that no child should be without a father. I told him that I would hold my own just fine in the war due to my superior knowledge and experience. Then I said some things that I shouldn't have, and..." Rukia trailed off, remembering the look of utter hurt and grief that had been on Ichigo's face as she had turned and walked away from him. Renji studied his friend's features for a moment as they continued walking.

"But that's in the past, now," he said. "Surely Ichigo will forgive you for whatever you said." She smiled ruefully.

"I hope so." Rukia looked forward again, paying no attention to the ambulance that rushed by in the same direction that the pair was walking in, her eyes alighting on several familiar figures who were hurrying down the sidewalk ahead of them. She broke out into a grin.

"Orihime, Chad, Ishida!" she called. They stopped in their tracks and turned around as she jogged forward to meet up with them, Renji close on her heels.

"Rukia!" they exclaimed, surprised, and waited until the pair had caught up to them.

"Hey," she greeted. "What's the rush?" The three of them blinked.

"Rukia," hedged Orihime. "That ambulance was headed toward the Kurosaki Clinic."

Rukia, Renji, Orihime, Chad, and Ishida arrived at the Clinic at a run. The scene that met their eyes was a horrific one.

Yuzu and Karin were standing off to the side of the door, Karin looking grim and Yuzu with tears in her eyes. The younger twin was holding a little boy with bright orange hair, who was crying quietly as he stared with huge violet eyes at the door of the clinic. Kurosaki Isshin and the paramedics were wheeling out a stretcher through the doors.

Upon that stretcher lay an obviously unconscious Kurosaki Ichigo, an oxygen mask covering his nose and mouth. His skin held a deathly pallor and a sheen of sweat made it glitter in the sunlight. This was what froze Rukia in her tracks and made her heart begin to pound in a fear that she had never known before.

Rukia gave a strangled cry and dashed forward, making a beeline towards the stretcher. However, she was intercepted by Karin and Isshin, who had to physically restrain her from going to her husband.

"Let me go!" she exclaimed. "What happened?! Is he going to be alright?! Let go of me!!" Isshin shook her roughly, his eyes hard as he gazed into her own.

"Ichigo's condition is moving into the critical stage, and if you go over there now, then you may push him over the edge," the eldest Kurosaki said firmly.

"What happened?!" Rukia repeated, her eyes glued to her husband's deathly still form. Isshin shook his head.

"A lot of things," he replied. "I'll explain on the way to the hospital." He pointed them over to the family car and went to close up the clinic. Rukia clambered into the car along with Yuzu, Karin, and Daisuke, and then she poked her head out of the window, looking for her friends. Renji saw this.

"We'll meet you at the hospital, Rukia!" he called. He was worried over Ichigo as much as the rest of them were, but Renji also knew that Rukia had been tortured for two years by guilt over the argument that she and her husband had had before she left. "Don't let him die on us, ya hear?!" She managed a watery smile and a weak nod, and then Isshin got in and they drove away, following the ambulance down the street.

"Isshin?" inquired Rukia after five minutes of silence, looking over at the man driving next to her. Isshin sighed and glanced at his daughter-in-law. His eyes were firm but tired.

"Why are you here, Rukia?" he asked, turning his gaze back to the road. She blinked, and then looked down at her lap.

"We finally got to a point that I could go home," she answered cryptically. "They wouldn't let me leave until it was done, otherwise I would have come sooner." Isshin frowned further.

"But why are you here, Rukia?" She blinked in confusion, and then fixed her eyes on the ambulance up ahead.

"I'm here because despite our harsh words to each other, I still love Ichigo," she said. "These two years have been hell, Isshin. I just wanted to come home and be with my family again, and when I arrived, I saw Ichigo being taken away in the ambulance." Rukia took a deep breath and bit her lip as the fear surged in her breast once more. She spun to face Isshin.

"Isshin, what has happened to my husband?" she asked. "What's wrong with Ichigo?" Isshin sighed again, glancing at Rukia and then into the rear-view mirror at his daughters and grandson.

"It's been a tough two years on Ichigo, too, Rukia," he said at length. "He's had to juggle raising a son on his own, as well as taking the evening shift in the clinic and going to med-school during the day. I don't know how long it's been since he ate a decent meal, and if he hasn't been eating, then he hasn't been sleeping for even longer than that. He says that he doesn't sleep because Daisuke tends to kick when he sleeps, but I think that that's just an excuse to hide something else. Lately he's taken to skipping meals, claiming to not be hungry." He fell silent, and Yuzu took over.

"Nii-san hasn't been the same since you left, Rukia-nee-chan," she said. There was a faint edge to her voice that hinted at her anger towards Rukia for being the cause of her brother's suffering. "He's become withdrawn. Since you left, all of his smiles are fake."

* * *

The waiting room that Rukia, Yuzu, Isshin, Karin, and Daisuke were led into at five o'clock was a bare, white place without emotion or warmth. Rukia immediately headed over to the door to the E.R., intending to at least watch her husband through the glass panes mounted in the double-doors, but a small hand tugging on her own hand stopped her.

"Thowwy, lady," said a small voice. "Gwampa thayth you can' go in dewe." Rukia looked down to come face to face with Daisuke. After a second, she knelt in front of him and looked pleadingly into his eyes.

"Daisuke, please let me go," she said. "I'm just going to look through the window to see how Ichigo's doing." The toddler blinked at her.

"Do I know you, lady?" he inquired, his face scrunching into a pout identical to one of Ichigo's own. Rukia smiled sadly and silently pulled her son into a hug, pressing his face into her shoulder.

"Yes, baby, you do, even if you don't know it, yet," she said. Daisuke was still for a moment, and then he relaxed into her embrace, his arms coming to fist loosely in the front of her sundress. After a moment, Rukia picked him up and then went to sit on one of the cool plastic chairs, holding him on her lap. Isshin spotted this, and a small smile came to his face. Even if this day ended in sadness, at least Daisuke would have one parent left to him.

* * *

Ichigo had been moved to the ICU at eight o'clock, after about three hours. Isshin had taken Karin, Daisuke, and Yuzu home about an hour after that, and Rukia had lingered in the waiting room until the nurses and doctors allowed her to go in and see Ichigo. Currently Isshin was in the bathroom and Rukia was sitting in one of the waiting room chairs.

"Kuchiki Rukia-san?" asked a feminine voice to Rukia's right. The petite shinigami looked over at the nurse who had spoken. "You are here for Kurosaki Ichigo, correct?" A nod. "You may see him, now. Please follow me." Rukia stood and followed after the nurse quietly, her mind continuing to whirl as it had done all evening. She did not take notice of Chad, Orihime, Ishida, and Renji entering the waiting room as she was led down the hall to the ICU. The nurse nodded to her as she stopped outside of the door.

"Kuchiki-san," said the nurse. "There are a couple of things that you should know before you go in there." Rukia looked up at her, listening intently. "Firstly, Kurosaki-san is unconscious, still, and his fever is still quite high. When you go in, there is a basin of cool water and a washcloth on the nightstand. If you re-wet the washcloth and lay it on his forehead every fifteen minutes or so, it will help bring his temperature down and ease some of his discomfort. If he stops breathing, press the red button on the wall next to the head of his bed. If you need any help or anything, just press the yellow button beneath the red button, and someone will come to assist you. Any questions?" Rukia shook her head. "Then you may go in. But be mindful to keep quiet. Kurosaki-san needs the rest desperately." Again Rukia nodded, and then the nurse held the door open for her as she entered the room.

The sight that met her eyes nearly brought Rukia to the tears that she had been holding in since she first saw Ichigo being wheeled out of the Clinic earlier that day. Ichigo was currently laying in the hospital bed, almost completely still but for the shallow, labored rise and fall of his chest that signaled his continued breathing. An oxygen mask was strapped to his pale face, and several IVs were attached to his arm. Heart-rate moniters were stuck to his chest.

After taking a moment to compose herself, Rukia went over to her husband and stood next to his bed, gazing down at his unconscious form. She could see the ashen pallor of his skin, the dark circles underneath his eyes, the gauntness to his cheeks. He almost looked like he had been in a ghetto, he was so sickly. The sheets were only covering him to his waist, and, when she ran a feather-light touch over his chest, she could nearly instantly feel his ribs underneath the strong, supple muscles of his torso. He had obviously kept himself in shape, despite his deteriorating health.

"Ichigo," Rukia said quietly, half-hoping that he would wake from his fever-induced haze. There was no response. Her face falling a bit, the petite shinigami pulled a chair up and sat down, taking his hand in one of her own, stroking the back of his palm as her other toyed slightly with his spiky orange hair. A small smile quirked her lips: his hair, at least, was still clinging vibrantly to life.

"Ichigo, wake up..."

* * *

It was nearly 11 o'clock at night when Ichigo first began convulsing.

Rukia had fallen asleep, her head pillowed on her arms on the side of the bed and her hand still clutching her husband's. A grunt and a small movement woke her from her light sleep, and she blinked groggily as she sat up. She woke fully when she saw Ichigo thrashing weakly, face contorted in a pained expression. She frowned, not quite knowing what was wrong and beginning to fear for him even more, and hurriedly pressed the red button at the head of the bed.

The doctor and nurses arrived within a few moments. By then Ichigo's convulsions had increased to the point where Rukia was half-laying on him to hold him down so that he did not fall out of the bed. Due to her small stature, she was struggling to do so. When the doctor saw what was happening, he ordered the nurses to help hold Ichigo down, and told one of them to fetch Kurosaki Isshin from the waiting room. As the nurses did as they were told, Rukia found herself pushed off to stand to the side, near the door, helpless to help the man she loved. Isshin came in a second later and aided in holding his son down, and Rukia was forgotten.

Moments after the convulsions began, Ichigo suddenly fell still, and the flatline note blared through the room from the heart monitor, causing Rukia's heart to nearly stop, as well. The doctor and Isshin immediately began barking out orders, but they fell flat before Rukia's ears. All she could see was her husband, lying completely and totally still on that hospital bed, without even the gentle rise and fall of his chest to signify his continuing life. She did not even know that she had stopped breathing, as well.

"It's kind of ironic, isn't it?" came a familiar voice from her left. She started, stiffening and sucking in a breath, and turned. Ichigo was standing there in his shihakusho, Zangetsu strapped to his back, as though this was just another mission that they had gone on in earlier years. But his brown eyes were disturbingly dull, and...

"Ichigo?" Rukia breathed, her eyes landing on the small hole in her husband's chest.

"I always thought that I would die in battle," Ichigo continued, voice small and toneless. "Instead I've been killed by my own stupidity and exhaustion and my bleeding, broken heart." Rukia blinked wide eyes at him and choked back a sob, biting her lip. He finally seemed to notice her, a flicker of recognition in his eyes though he continued to stare dispassionately at his body on the gurney.

"When you left, you took half my soul with you, Rukia," he continued, heedless of her reaction. "That's why this hole is here. And now you've returned to haunt me in my moment of death. Why are you here, Rukia?" That same question. She answered truthfully.

"I'm here for you, Ichigo. I'm here because, despite what I said, I really do love you." She sniffed slightly, fighting back her tears. "Ichigo, you can't die yet! Do you know what Daisuke said to me earlier? I asked him who the person he looked up to most and loved the most was, and he said you! He said that you are, and then he said, 'I don't want Daddy to die!' and broke down into tears!" A choked sob forced its way out of her throat as Ichigo's soul jolted as the doctor pressed a charged defibrillator to Ichigo's body's chest. "That was only when you were feverish! You can't leave us like this, Ichigo!" Finally some emotion showed, as he spun towards her and grabbed her by the front of her sundress, pulling her towards him and leaning down to where he was only inches away from her face. His eyes were blazing with anger that sprung from a deep hurt that had long cut its way into his heart.

"You mean the way _you_ left us for _two years_?!" he hissed. "You left us for two fucking years, Rukia! Can you even comprehend what you did to us when you left?! You killed my spirit and left Daisuke without a mother for two of the most important years of his life!" Rukia's violet eyes were wide in shock as she stared up into Ichigo's furious brown orbs. "You missed so many important parts of his life, all because you decided to do as your duty dictated, and break my heart so that you could go fight in a war!" He released her dress, panting as he spun away from her.

"Do you have any idea how powerful words are?!" he asked bitterly. "In the Christian religion, people believe that God created the world with just a word! That's the power of words for you! Words have the power to create and to destroy, Rukia! Which do you think you did when you said those things to me?!" Rukia swallowed forcefully around the lump in her throat, squeezing her eyes shut tight. She knew what she had done.

"I know what I did, Ichigo," she whispered after a moment. "I know what I said, and I know what I destroyed. If I could take it all back, I would, but I can't. I can't mend your heart with my words alone, Ichigo, but if you would be willing, I could try to mend your spirit and heart through my words and my actions." She saw his shoulders tense, but he gave no indication of acceptance or denial. He jolted again as the doctor used the defibrillator sent another electric charge into his worn body, but otherwise did not move. Rukia was now beginning to openly cry, her shoulders shaking in fear, desperation, and pain.

"Ichigo, please!" she cried. "You can't leave! Daisuke and I still need you! I still love you!" Now he reacted, straightening up and turning around. His features were furious, but as he saw her sincere tears and fear for his life, his shoulders slumped wearily. Ichigo shook his head in bewilderment.

"You really want me, then?" She nodded firmly, watery eyes looking up into his.

"Yes." This was said with such conviction that, as he jolted for a third, and final, time, his eyes did not leave hers, and the hole in his chest closed up a miniscule amount. Ichigo seemed to deliberate for a moment, and then he looked sadly into her eyes again, the pain and grief of his own heart displayed openly on his face for the first time. He slowly looked over to the hospital bed upon which his body lay, and saw his father's devastated expression as the doctor called the time of death. At the sound of it, Rukia gave a strangled cry.

"Ichigo!" she shouted. Ichigo's soul looked into her eyes one more time as the nurses came over and shepherded her from the room. The last she saw of him as the doors swung closed behind her was a new determination springing into his brown orbs. Then she was in the hallway, sobbing uncontrollably as she fought the nurses to get back in the room, calling her husband's name along with a few strings of colorful words and curses.

"Let me go!!" she shouted. "Let me go!! He's not dead!! He's not dead!!" But the nurses did not heed her but to give her sad looks. Finally Rukia felt herself enveloped in a strong embrace and collapsed into Renji's arms, sobbing for all she was worth. Soon Orihime was hugging her, as well as Tatsuki, who had arrived only half an hour before. Each girl was crying her own eyes out. Ishida and Chad just looked completely shocked. The flatline note rang its terrible song in their ears, a one-tone death march for one of the most powerful shinigami that had ever been.

But then the flatline broke and then began to pulse rapidly once more, and suddenly there was shouting from the room. Stunned, the nurses ran back into the room, leaving an equally shocked group of teens and shinigami kneeling and standing in the hallway outside the door to the ICU. A few moments passed, and then Kurosaki Isshin came out, staring contemplatively back at the door. Rukia stood shakily and looked pleadingly up into her father-in-law's eyes.

"Isshin?" she inquired, hardly daring to believe.

"He's alive," answered Isshin distractedly. "By some miracle, he's alive after five minutes of flatlining. Now we can only hope that he continues to stay alive and doesn't slip into a coma or have brain damage." His eyes finally landed on Rukia's, and he watched as she seemed to crumple before him, falling to her knees and crying once more, but this time in joy and relief. Orihime, Renji, and Tatsuki gathered the petite girl into their arms again, dazed by the sudden turn of events. After a moment, Tatsuki looked up at Isshin, wonder in her gaze.

"He's going to be alright, then?" she asked. He softened his look into a small, haggard smile.

"If all goes well, he will be," he replied. "If I know my son, then he won't give up so easily again." Isshin shrugged. "He's stubborn as a mule."

* * *

Brown eyes weakly fluttered open as she came into the room, and a miniscule smirk found its way onto his lips.

"Hey," he croaked, voice barely louder than a whisper. Rukia gave Ichigo a watery smile, taking his hand in both of her own.

"Hey," she breathed. Unshed tears glittered in her violet orbs, but she refused to let them fall in his presence. Ichigo saw the way her eyes seemed to swim in the light from the halogen lamps overhead.

"You can cry if you want to, you know," he whispered. Rukia's smile widened, and she lifted his hand to her lips, tenderly placing a lingering kiss on his knuckles. Then her brow furrowed faintly and she released him so that she could press his palm against her cheek. Ichigo watched her with half-lidded eyes as tears coursed their silent ways down her cheeks, still exhausted from the ordeal he had endured. It was a moment before either of them spoke again.

"You really scared me, Ichigo," Rukia choked out around the lump in her throat.

"I know," was all he said.

* * *

Several weeks had passed since Ichigo's close brush with death. Currently he was settled on the couch in his family's living room, snoring very quietly as Daisuke watched an anime on the television, sitting comfortably on his father's lap. Rukia was in the kitchen with Yuzu, finishing making lunch and chatting in a friendly manner. When the meal was ready, Yuzu went to get Isshin and Karin, and Rukia went to round up her husband and son. Wiping her hands on a towel, she stopped in the doorway at the sight that met her eyes, a genuinely happy smile upturning her lips.

Ichigo was stretched out on the couch, his head resting on a pillow and his hand on one end, and his feet were draped over the opposite arm. Daisuke had fallen asleep, also, and was curled up in a ball on Ichigo's chest. Ichigo's arm was unconsciously wrapped around the two-year-old's tiny body, a protective gesture spawned from the young father's subconscious need to defend his child.

Rukia shook her head slightly and backed into the kitchen in silence, motioning for the other three to quiet down and follow her. Isshin, Karin, and Yuzu blinked a bit, but peeked out into the living room around the doorjamb anyway. In a second they were all seated at the kitchen table, small, full-hearted smiles on their faces as they affixed the memory of Ichigo and Daisuke into their minds. None of them took for granted the fact of how close they had come to never seeing this moment.

"Let's let them sleep for a little while longer," said Rukia. Isshin smiled up at his daughter-in-law.

"I think we can manage that."

* * *

**_And the moral of this story is? Sleep and eat enough to stay healthy._**

**_...The other moral? ...What other moral?_**

**_I hope they weren't too out of character. If they were, I apologize._**

**_Please review._**

**_-Fanatic_**


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